Day of Love

 

Not going to lie, loving brief hits of warmer weather without humidity.  I can take heat any day but leave the damn moisture out of the air.  Plus, having just a tiny bit of light later in the night lifts my spirits after so many dark night runs.  

Two lifts this week including upper body and lower body and three runs including a rain run that was a tad bit short of my 4 I've been aiming for.  Bad Bunny is still jamming in my ears and pushing me through my work outs and runs.  Damn his music is so good for getting you going and keeping you going.  Plus, they keep me dancing between sets and I love a good salsa!

Happy Valentines Day y'all!!!!  Woke up to heart shaped donuts on Friday. Mine was quite delicious and I shared it with my coworker bestie and my boss since she needed some chocolate love.  

Andrew got some chocolate and I got some roses day of and we spent the night eating heart shaped pizza and chocolate covered strawberries.  It was the perfect day to spend the day of love.

I want to end on a serious note, and I know I've talked about this before but here I am again having serious anxiety due to many things in my life.  I'm not to the point of puking in garbage cans, not sleeping, not functioning period, but I'm pretty damn close and I don't want to get to that point.  I am going back to therapy every 2 weeks, but the cause of the anxiety is not going to go away because I live with the cause every day in my house.    I'm not sure how to fix this.  I don't want to get to the point of flight again but it's there bubbling under the surface.   I try not to worry about things that I can't control like when people pay my hubby and how he runs his business, but I can't stop it.  At the end of the day the debt he brings into his business and if he loses it period will ultimately affect me, especially since my parents are now involved financially as well.  It literally is driving me nuts and consuming all of my thoughts.  I'm watching stress slowly kill my hubby and it's only a matter of time before it turns on me.  I'm trying all my tricks, all the things that have worked for me in the past (including writing in this blog), and they just aren't working.  I've left medication as the last resort and here I am at the last resort.  All of that word vomit to say stay tuned and send any positive vibes/prayers/good feelings/whatever you can give me my way.   I know I can get out of this, just got to get there in one piece and get it figured out.  

Sorry for ending on such a bummer note but truly have a great week y'all.