Toxic and Health update part deux

More on that title at the end........

Another week, another concert.  This time choir.  So excited that Andrew has decided to keep at choir in high school. While he isn't the best singer out there, I feel like there is so much good in fine arts and being a part of both band and choir.   As always, I loved the final number which is a collaboration between the high school and the middle school choirs.  Also LOVED the competition piece that our high school choir is going to be competing with.  I mean who doesn't love a well sung Latin song.  The solos were so amazing as well.    

Two runs and two work outs (upper and lower body).  It's been a weird week and I'm just happy to get whatever I can this week.  One run with Boom (4) and one run with psycho chick (5).   I miss how easy it is to run with Boom who cares nothing about cars, birds, airplanes in the sky, the worm the wriggled in the dirt, the cow that farted two miles away.  I kid but she is SO sensitive to EVERYTHING!  He is so quiet and so sweet ad a perfect little running partner.  I so wish I could run with both of the again and may try this spring and see if Ollie has calmed down.  

 

First of all, marry a man who puts up with your moods/health issues/anxiety.  This is a picture of Tony putting on my estrogen patch for me.  

Health update part two.  I met with an endocrinologist this week finally to discuss a path forward with regards to my thyroid.  Spoiler alert, the path is wait and hold.  The mass that I feel is NOT a nodule; it's the actual thyroid itself.  As to why it's so pissed off, we aren't sure, but until it causes issues and or my mom's nodule testing comes back cancer, we are just in a wait and hold period.  Yearly ultrasounds for sure and a follow up in a few months to check in and see if changes have happened.  Surgery is always a possibility, but only if it causes compression issues like I can't swallow or I can't breathe.  We aren't there yet, but if it gets bigger, we could be.  Anway, watching my mychart app as the test results roll in and I don't think I am a positive for any of the auto immune issues that might have caused the size change so that is a bonus.  I was shocked and pleased to hear at least in my endocrinologist's practice that needle biopsies aren't as common anymore as they felt like 90 percent or more of nodules are benign and it's a waste of time and money to do them.  The best news of anything????  My endo is a board-certified menopause specialist who LOVES working with women who need answers and boy do I ever.  She is putting me on estrogen patches and cream and is allowing me to up my progesterone so that I sleep at night all night.   I will take extra weight in exchange for sleep.  I am so excited to FINALLY get on the road to being me again, even if old me was just as crazy.    

We did celebrate Pi Day in Manhattan with pie from Aj's pizza and pie from Therapie, two of our favorite local joints.

The French silk is like melt in your mouth amazing.  We also now have to go to the snow cone place any time we are in town and while I felt like we had enough sugar, I was about to make the Andrew sit in a brewery for a few hours, so I relented. Shark attack snow cone for the win.  Another local business hit up as well.  

Finished the night at Manhattan Brewing Company.

We had beers, live music, and good food from Piccalilli Farms.  Two more good local companies that we love to support.  

Of course, the Church Ladies Unsupervised brought a big crowd with them and we had fun singing along with their tunes.  Andrew got to see an upright base being played and that was the goal of us being there.  I love exposing him to so much good live and local music.  He's still developing his style and his tastes, and my goal is to get him to as much live music as I can so that he can see a wide variety.  

Let's end on this.  I would love to develop the skill mentioned above and if anyone has ANY tips to help my brain, please share.  Toxic is not a word I've ever been called and while I know it's manipulation, it still hurts.  I've been accused of creating a toxic work environment and while I know that isn't true at all, hearing those words has affected me in ways I never thought it would. Words hurt and I've always worn my heart on my sleeve so that pierced it quite quickly and caused me some sleepless nights.  I apologized to the coworkers I care about, and they assured me that I did not cause any issues in their minds.  I am always working on me and if I am not the best version of me, then I want to know.  This is why I go to therapy.  I've had some self-doubt this week and I will definitively treat the work environment differently from now on moving forward.  I hate to think that work is just about showing up, doing my job, and leaving, but I think for my mental health, that is what I am going to have to do.  I'm still on the fence about upping my meds versus waiting to see if my estrogen patches kick in.  I do have a follow up appointment next week and I guess we can talk all the options over and see what we think is best as a team.  Stay tuned.  

Have a great week y'all!  It's supposed to be negative wind chill and 90 all in the same week so there is that!