Stressed, blessed, and obsessed

Stress is the name of the game this week.  All I can say or want to say right now was this week was full of emergency meetings, stress, and lack of sleep.  I am one of those people who takes words, even if they aren't meant for me very seriously.  Kind of funny that with all that is going on, this was our Girls on the Run lesson this week.  

Even if I know what the right thing is to do, sometimes it's still super hard for me to follow through when it affects people negatively, EVEN if they are the source of all of the problems.  I know that if punishments are not handed out that change won't happen, but I am still very upset on what needs to happen.  Enough sadness and self reflection, let's get to happiness because honestly discussing this sounds so dumb in light of what actually happened!  I even told my therapist the words coming out of my mouth sound foreign and silly and while she agreed the situation is incredibly stupid, she did agree that my ability to process is not there yet and won't be till I heal from past trauma.     

I got three runs in, one with my girls, one by myself post football, and one long run.  I've been pretty sleep deprived all week due to stress and late nights, so running just wasn't a priority.  My runs lately feel sooooo good thanks to cooler weather.  I just need to convince my mentally tired body that I will feel so much better if I just go.  My long run, while I overdressed, felt great and I should be good to go to run my 25K if we aren't in tournament.  

Football was very exciting!  We had heard that the back up team was going to get their first start and they did!  Two whole plays before they were taken out due to the other team scoring.  Oh well, they tried.  They work so hard and they just aren't ready I guess.  At least we got the W and several B team boys got to sub in and out.  Andrew got to play the entire 3rd quarter and while the other team's offense had the ball the entire 8 minutes, the defense held them to no scores during their possession.  Andrew didn't get to play anymore than that, but he seemed okay with it and I have to be okay with it too.  He is a late bloomer and while I know this and I know his competitiveness is coming, it's still hard to watch at times and to be a part of it sometime.  I do still feel like his strength is offense, not defense but this year he has played defense mostly, go figure.  

I am leaving this right here. I  need to make some tough decisions on several areas of my life.  Some that may affect lots of people around me.  Going back to therapy has opened my eyes to many things in my life that I have to get right and fast.  None of the decisions are easy or will be taken lightly. Y'all just drop a prayer or some positive energy my way as I navigate all of this.

And then this.  My last time I ran Chicago came up on my memories.  I love this race so much and can't wait to run it again when I turn 50!  I also want to take Andrew this time so he can see the city I so love.  

Okay ending here.  Y'all have a great week, whatever it brings ya!