#Boomtown

Getting a little bit bad about not getting my blog written or out on time.  Thank goodness I don't do any blog link ups!  I will try and do better this time by starting out writing a little at the beginning of the week since I get two days off thanks to the holiday.   

First of all I have to give a huge thanks to my parents from driving over from Tennessee every year to help with our 4th of July party.  They work their asses off getting the house and yard ready so we can all party on the fourth.  They cook, they clean, they burn things, and they set all of the things up.

Our town goes from 5K to about 50K in one day as we are known as #boomtown.  We have one of the best and biggest hand fired fourth of July shows in the nation.  People fly and drive in just for our show and I am not kidding when I say it is one of the best and rivals any big city show.  While you can sit anywhere in the giant field for the show, there is a VIP seating area right in front of where they shoot off the fire works and we get armbands for 25 friends to join us.  The last few years, we have had several of our track families come and join us for food, fun, and fireworks.  This year was amazing, even with storms that hit right after the show was done and we were back to the house.  

We had three track families and two running families join us and we had yummy food and drink all day. Plus, they had some homemade ice cream down the block and hydration teas two blocks over.  It was hot, but we all managed to stay cool enough, watched the parade with the kids getting tons of candy, and shot off fireworks periodically all day to enjoy the day.  This truly is my favorite holiday.    

Andrew wasn't into the carnival and fireworks like usual, but we still got some shot off the night of the fourth and the day after since the storm cut our session of blowing up wamego short.  I am glad our city gives us one more day past the holiday to get rid of what we buy.  Honestly, we were pretty tame this year with what we bought and blew up and I kind of liked it.  Andrew bought me several pretty fountains, some that made a little noise, but most that were just pretty to look at and that is my jam.  

My parents headed back on the 6th to Tennessee and I had a super rough day mentally.  As I mentioned, my anxiety has been through the roof lately and while they were here, it was super manageable, but as soon as they left, back to where it was times ten.  I also had a big coming to Jesus moment with my hubby.  I am lead on a new project that will have many days starting at 5 am.  I can't continue to work both jobs, not even the book work I am doing that can be done at any time.  I need this mentally off of my plate and I had reached a breaking point.  After yet another session of showing him what I do and how, I left the shop hoping for the best, preparing for the worst.  

After all, this is not my business.  It's never been mine, it's always been his and that is okay. I need to let go of any control I was trying to keep intentionally or unintentionally and let it all be his.  He is a grown adult, he wanted to be a small business owner, and I learned after a few years that while I love the flexibility of owning your own small business, I do not love the stress and heart ache.  Some people are born to fight and scratch and claw their way to the top 24:7 and that's just not me.  It takes all kinds.  

I did get some running done amid the chaos.  I have found that running is truly the only thing that calms me down mentally and evens me out.  We got two short runs and that was it for the week due to us being super busy all weekend.  Yeah I could have gotten up early both weekend mornings as it was glorious but I chose instead to get what sleep I could, and enjoy the days to the fullest.  

Speaking of the weekend, it was very jam packed.  We had promised Andrew a trip to Legoland with a friend if he was okay with not having a party this year.  He agreed but finding a weekend where his friend wasn't playing sports was tough.   We finally got them together and headed out to KC to explore Legoland and Sea life which is right next door.  Again, I was a little worried as we had been to Legoland many years ago and I felt it was a little "young" for 2 eleven year olds.  My worry was misplaced because they had a ball and did ALL.THE.THINGS.  We even were able to go have a late lunch over at Fritz's restaurant where they have the trains deliver food and then made a second pit stop on the way home in NOTO to show Andrew's buddy what a cool little spot it was.  We are all going to go back when the antique shops are open because surprise, his buddy LOVES antiquing like us!  

We ended the weekend with some racing.  I had hoped for better results but that just didn't happen.  Tony had talked to the engine builder during the week and he had told tony the new engine was not geared correctly and needed to be changed.  We just didn't' have the time to devote to making changes to the cars and then getting them out to practice and it hurt us.  I hate that Andrew was so confident going into the season and now is so upset because he wants to win and the cars just aren't there for him to do so.  I feel like he is finally holding up his end of the bargain and we are failing.  And every year I think, this is going to be a good year and there will be little to no drama and I am wrong every single time.  Sigh.  I left the track, drove home, and went to bed.  Why do I do things that bring me no joy?  Oh yeah, my kid does love this sport and wants to race above everything else.  

Have a great week y'all!  I am going to certainly try!