While sipping on a nice Leines Ginger/Cranberry shandy, let's talk about my sudden feelings about not wanting to work and wanting to be at home with my kiddo. I have NO clue where this feeling came from, and it started before i was home all day every day this week with him. I have even shed a few tears this week, and no I am not preggers or getting ready for my monthly friend. I have seriously been a mess lately about working full time and being gone from him so much. Even if I were to stay at home, he would still need to go to preschool at least during the "school year" and of course kindergarten starts soon, so there is that as well. I keep telling myself that all of the fun things we do when I am off work and together would probably not happen, because we wouldn't have the extra money to do those things. I keep telling myself I need the health care coverage for both of us because it is way better than what my hubby carries. I keep telling myself I have the most wonderful of bosses, both bosses ( i technically work part time in two labs but am really in one lab full time most of the time), and that I need to remember I will never ever be this lucky again. I mean, who let's their employee off for a solid week to take care of their sick kiddos without even batting an eye lash??? Yet, that feeling still persists and strongly. I feel like even though science is one of my passions, that i could walk away from it right now and not even miss it. This is not like me at all. I am doing lots of praying and lots of thinking. I am kind of glad for this week off because I am hoping it will give me some time off to really think about what I really want with my life, and what direction God is leading me. I have honestly had these feelings before, but never ever this strongly. I am listening God, lead me where you want (and forgive me for the beer:)
Let's stick to the Leines, since I am kind of a blubbering mess lately. You know, low ABV if you are going to drink more than one y'all is where it is at! I am seriously worried about Stella. She has changed. For one, she has horrible allergies now. I have been in contact with my vet and KSU and will go in March 10th for her recheck, but I don't know if we will be able to last that long. She is starting to chew and scratch much more now. Of course the treatment for an allergy flare up is, you guessed it, steriods. KSU is concerned that we will have a hard time managing allergies in her since her immune system is so screwed up as it is. I am trying to manage things on my end till we get her in by adding some quality fish oil to her diet, using a spray on her itchiest spot (her front elbows pictured below), and keeping her ears super clean.
On top of that, while she isn't limping (whew), she is sore. She gets up like an old woman, not a 5 year old dog. This surely means she did have damage to her joints, with that back leg being the worst. She wants to exercise, she seems to enjoy our walks that we do 3-4 times a week, but I am super worried that is too much even. I am hoping we can manage this some how, which ultimately means I can't quit my day job :). She also isn't much a food hound lately. Not having a naughty stella worries me. Non naughty stella I hope is due to the allergies and not so much the pain. I SO hope the allergies aren't going to start her IMPA back up again.
And let's end on a good note instead of more emotional diarrhea by me. One more Leines down the hatch. Little red is getting really good at his letters. Numbers, not so much, but baby steps right?